All posts by RaShaun Eshalomi

Editor-in-Chief @RaylaDevine

Winnie the Pooh’s Dubious Sexuality and Inappropriate Dress

In the small Polish  town of Tuszyn, a local council met to discuss what fictional character will be the face of a children’s play area. When Winnie the Pooh was mentioned, the idea was quickly shot down and Pooh was labeled a hermaphrodite, because he doesn’t wear pants.

I’ve never come to that conclusion about Pooh and I’m sure many others never thought of this either. I wish I was in that meeting because this is hilarious.

Especially the neutering part:
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“This is very disturbing, but can you imagine! The author was over 60 and cut [Pooh’s] testicles off with a razor blade because he had a problem with his identity.”

Is that what happened? Poor Pooh.

You can read more about Pooh being a deviant at The Independent.

 

Barbie Tries Computer Engineering and Screws It Up for the Rest of Us

*Update: Two roommates, Casey Fiesler and Miranda Parker have made some changes to this disaster of a book.

Barbie, I remember when you were a Doctor, an Ambassador for world peace, a police officer and even President of the United States. Now, you’re taking on the male-dominated field of computer science in Barbie’s newest book I Can Be a Computer Engineer. Unfortunately, it’s not the encouraging, “girls can do anything” kind of book I’m sure Mattel was going for. Instead it’s filled with the usual sexist message most women in the field experience everyday.

Let’s get into some examples, shall we?

“I’m designing a game that shows kids how computers work,” explains Barbie. “You can make a robot puppy do cute tricks by matching up colored blocks!”

Educational? Check. Fun? Check. Cute? Check. So far so good. This would be perfect for growing kids and this would encourage girls to learn some coding.

“Your robot puppy is so sweet, says Skipper. Can I play your game?”

“I’m only creating the design ideas,” Barbie says, laughing. “I’ll need Steven and Brian’s help to turn it into a real game!”

Duh Skipper! You need men to make a “real game” of course. Silly girl.

Screw you Barbie, screw you.

It gets worse:
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barbie gets a virus on her computerBarbie puts a virus on Skipper's computer

Silly, Barbie, you put a virus on your computer and Skipper’s computer?! How are you going to get out of this one?

Barbie tells Steven and Brian about the viruses

Steven tells Barbie fixing it will go faster if the two guys do it. Barbie agrees

The two dudes solve the silly girl’s computer issue, and they did it faster than Barbie ever would have, of course!

Oh Barbie, you did it again: reinforced sexist and misogynistic stereotypes. This is sad. Who thought this was a good idea, ever? It’s like no one read even read it before they mass produced it and shipped it out to all these poor girls.

If you would like see more of this horrible book, Pamela Ribbon did everyone a favor and read this wonderful book (so we wouldn’t have too) and blogged about how much of a fail it is.

Whaaaaaaaaat? Two Female Main Characters? A quick look at Redux Ark

On October 29, Hyper Games announced its new exploration, survival adventure called Redux Ark.

Redux Ark takes place  in the year 2039. The last bee on Earth—yea they’re important—died 200 years ago, which started a domino effect of doom on Earth. After discovering a twin planet, Genema, the people of Earth made one last attempt to survive by building a ship called the Redux Ark. The plan was to travel to the twin planet; collect plants, animals and any other organic matter; then take it back to Earth.

Unfortunately, as the Redux Ark closed in on Gemena’s atmosphere, the crew lost control of the ship and crash landed on Gemena. Only three people survived the crash: a scientist, a soldier and a pathfinder. Now, along with collecting plants and animals, the survivors must also collect all the pieces of their ship and fix it, while fighting off the unknown dangers on Gemena.

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Even though the announcement was paired with only a concept teaser trail, I’m excited. This game has a lot of potential, and knowing so little about the game keeps my imagination going. I’m also excited about  the three main characters because two of them are women. It feels weird to get excited about something that should be a normal occurrence, but that’s where gaming is right now.

Usually the cast is dominated by men (e.g. Assassins Creed Unity, GTA V, Left 4 Dead 1 & 2 etc.), and female gamers (if they care) have to settle for the one and only woman on the team—even the female choices in Call of Duty: Advanced Warfare are slim compared to the male options. Luckily, Hyper Games has decided not to take the typical route.

The estimated time of arrival is 2016. I can’t wait to see what the people of Hyper Games come up with!

GTA V Limited Edition Soundtrack Box Sets

To celebrate the release of GTA V on the PS4, PC and Xbox One, Rockstar Games is collaborating with Mass Appeal Records to release the GTA V Limited Edition Soundtrack Box Sets. Each box set includes 59 tracks of original music—Tyler the Creator, Flying Lotus, Wavves and more—and will be available online and in record stores on December 9.

GTA V Soundtrack CD Box SetThe CD collection comes with three discs, a GTA V gold brick-shaped USB drive, artwork and a poster. Or you could get the vinyl collection, which includes six records a colorful booklet and a lithograph poster. Only about 5,000 units will be produced worldwide.

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The Vicious Brothers are Back with EXTRATERRESTRIAL

I didn’t know what to expect when I first read the description of Extraterrestrial—I’m not a huge alien-horror-film fan because the thought of aliens scares the shit out of me.  Honestly, when I saw this was another The Vicious Brothers creation, that was enough to get me interested. Their first two movies Grave Encounters and Grave Encounters 2 successfully shut down my plans to tour any haunted locations. Despite that, I was ready to be scared again.

The set up is cliché: the almost happy couple, April (Brittany Allen) and Kyle (Freddie Stroma), make plans to spend the weekend at a cabin in the woods of a small town. Kyle invites Mel (Melanie Papalia), April’s best friend; Seth (Jesse Moss), the annoyingly funny loudmouth and Seth’s new ditsy girlfriend, Lex (Anja Savcic). On the way to the cabin, Seth causes some trouble, which leads the group to meet the Sheriff (Gil Bellows); by looking at him you can tell he’s going through a tough time. Soon after arriving at the cabin, April and Mel run into April’s old family friend, Travis, played by the great and always crazy Michael Ironside.

Later that night, after witnessing a ball of fire fly out of the sky and crash in the distance, the group decides to go check it out—great idea. Shit goes down hill from there: an alien is shot and a pack of pissed off aliens make it their duty to hunt the group down.

Though the characters are one sided, the actors are believable and play their parts well—by the end of the movie I wanted Seth to die and the couple to live happily ever after. We learn very little about the main characters’ backgrounds other than they like to smoke, drink, and they are in college. Regardless of what we know (or don’t know) about them, it was nice to see them make some smart moves to get the hell out of dodge. When I yelled at them to “Get in the car and leave!” they actually listened; I was quite pleased. You get a little insight into the Sheriff’s background and you feel bad for him, but not enough to make you really care.

Travis’ crazy conspiracy theory explanation of the alien’s presence is a nice change from the usual “we’re aliens, we can do whatever we want because our planet is dying/we’re bored/uh, we’re freakin’ aliens” explanation.

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The film does not look low budget at all. Very little special effects were used, which I love and appreciate. I didn’t like the found-footage-styled scenes; you know, like The Blair Witch Project or Paranormal Activity. They seem like a last minute addition and didn’t help the film; luckily they disappear as the action builds up. The aliens. You get to see the aliens and they look creepy-good and real. Their grey bodies are long and thin, and the eyes are large black pools on their expressionless faces.

The ending disappointed me. I was hoping for something different—it would have been so cool—but the last 5 – 10 minutes are drawn out and corny.  I get the feeling it was done on purpose.

As I watched the movie, I couldn’t tell if The Vicious Brothers wanted this film to poke fun at the horror genre, be a legit thriller or a mix of both. Maybe they were trying to create a scary horror-spoof. Travis’ exaggerated crazy-guy-in-the-woods character is the complete opposite from the Sheriff’s gloom or the group’s desperate attempt to save themselves. Also, death by butt probe? Gotta be a spoof, right? Despite the confusion, I enjoyed Extraterrestrial—more than I thought I would. I laughed, I jumped and I got a little twist.This film gave me a much needed break from the slew of paranormal films that have come out recently. I just wish it ended my way.

Extraterrestrial will be released at New York’s IFC Center and additional U.S. theaters on November 21, 2014.